For most of my life, college was something that I did not expect to do. It was always there, something adults talked about, something almost every older student prepared for, but it never really came to me to want to go to college when I was younger. That changed when I entered 9th grade again, due to having to make up for the 2021-2022 year that I did not attend. At that point in time, academics were my top priority over anything else. But then I realized that it wasn’t all about academics, but extracurriculars mattered just as much. I did not join the fencing team sophomore year, or join the newspaper club junior year for just college however. It was for me. 

The college application process is often described as exciting, and in many ways, it is. The things that stand out are touring the campuses, imaging a future in a new environment, and thinking about opportunities that colleges offer. Such as sports, organizations, or clubs. When I submitted my own applications to roughly seventeen schools, I felt relieved. After putting a lot of effort into my college essay back in April 2025 and fully finalizing it by October, I knew that it is now a waiting game. After spending years of working hard academically, everything eventually comes down to the admissions people who review my application. 

One of the hardest parts of the process for me personally was learning to live with uncertainty. For three years, I worked to improve myself academically by raising my GPA, and getting involved with a sport and club. I’ve visited a few campuses multiple times, trying to picture where I can see myself living and studying for the next four or five years. Each campus I visited had their own thing, their own message, their own architecture. The schools that stood out to me the most were Lehigh University and Drew University, mainly because of their old styled buildings that they have. Touring Lehigh felt like going to Hogwarts, and it was definitely one of the best campuses I visited, while Drew felt like Rutgers University in a smaller form due to their brick buildings that they had. Their campus felt quiet, and calm. As for Ramapo College and Rowan University, the schools were more modern with Rowan having its own city. While Ramapo College had modern buildings, the campus felt smaller and overall better to me than Rowan. 

But there is also pressure that comes with the college process. Expectations exist everywhere, whether from family, peers, or even from within. People have opinions about where you should go, what level of challenge is right for you, and what path makes the most sense. While getting advice can be helpful, it can also create doubt. There have been moments where I questioned if all of my hard work that I have done is truly worth it. I have realized that growth does not come from staying in what feels comfortable or “easy,” but it comes from a willingness to challenge yourself even when success is not guaranteed. In the end, I have gotten into a total of eight colleges. Four of them offer full-rides or almost a full-ride. So I have lots of options.

But as the decision deadlines approach, I don’t know where I will end up. It is between Drew University, University of Notre Dame, Lehigh University, University of Richmond, or Ramapo College. That is uncertainty intimidating, but it is also a reminder that my future is still unwritten. Regardless of where I commit, the process itself has already changed me. It taught me resilience, patience, and the importance of believing in myself even when faced with doubt. 

For juniors who are going to go through this process in the future, my advice is simple: do not let uncertainty discourage you. Just apply to the schools that you see yourself going to, or apply for fun. Where you go will matter, but what matters more is who you choose to become once you go there. No matter where I end up, I know that I challenged myself, took risks, and refused to settle for less than what I believed I was capable of. And in the end, that may be the most important outcome of all.